Emotional Resilience: 5 Practical Strategies for Tough Days

Emotions can be fickle.  My mom taught me that.  When I was in my emotionally charged teen years, I remember my mom telling me not to trust my feelings.  As I matured, I learned that emotions can often completely mislead me.

Unfortunately, emotions can also impact one’s ability to make quality decisions and engage in life.  So how do you work through days like that?

To be clear, I am not referring to clinical depression or any mental health diagnosis. Please seek medical help if that describes you.  My perspective here is that of one who occasionally feels “off” –  A day where you may lack desire to do pretty much anything, maybe you are weepy or sad, uninspired and bored. 

Here are 5 practical steps I have used to help get me out of that funk.

  1. Make a list.
  2. Do it anyway.
  3. Write 3 things to be thankful for.
  4. Engage with nature.
  5. Help someone else.

Now let’s break that down a bit.

Make a list

Everyone knows that people who make lists tend to get more accomplished.  Plus, there’s something about writing it down and crossing it off that feels so good!  Because the crossing off of completed items is so satisfying, I write down each little thing.  For example, when making a list for cleaning, I write: 

uncheckedClean the toilet

uncheckedClean the shower

uncheckedClean the mirror

uncheckedClean the counters

uncheckedClean the floor

Rather than:

uncheckedClean the bathroom

Get it?  I get to cross off 5 things instead of 1! 🙂  That way I feel much more accomplished when the bathroom is cleaned. LOL. 

If you are finding it difficult to do anything and everything, perhaps you want to write down 3 small steps that you know you will be able to accomplish pretty easily.  Cross them off and celebrate! 

Do hard things

More often than not, I simply don’t feel like doing…..well, anything when I’m in one of those funks.  To be honest, I’d rather just curl up in bed and wait for it to be tomorrow.  Again, I am not talking about clinical depression.  If you struggle with clinical depression, please be sure to see a counselor, therapist or physician to help manage your depression.  

As I have matured, I have learned how to tell myself how to do hard things.  Sometimes, I actually need to give myself a little hard lecture.  Can you imagine a tough football coach and how he might motivate his team of players?  I don’t think he’s talking gently to them when they are down by 10 and playing terribly.  He’s likely going to be yelling at them and probably using some foul language. Well, minus the language, I have learned to speak to myself toughly, just like I need at that moment.  

Our society has focused so much on what a person wants or doesn’t want in so many areas that I think we’ve forgotten what it’s like to do hard things.  Doing hard things is great for developing character, plus it often leads to really great stories!  Too often, we are afraid to try hard things – and there’s lots of reasons for that, but one is simply that we are out of practice.  Some days, it feels really hard to get out of bed and go to work.  Other days it feels really hard to skip the cookie and drink more water.  

Nike had it right – Just do It. If you are feeling weak here, it’s ok!  Start with something small – something you wrote on that list of 3 things and just do it.

Be thankful

Being grateful has become very trendy in the last decade.  And its value is tremendous.  From my experience, choosing to list things I am grateful for gives me a better appreciation for life and allows me to acknowledge positive things.  

You should know I am an avid Bible reader and there are many directives to be thankful – 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Philippians 4:6, Psalm 100:4, Psalm 92:1-2, Psalm 9:1-2, Psalm 107:21, and Psalm 106:1 are a few examples. 

Struggling to identify some things to be grateful for?  Here’s a starter list:

  • Breath in my lungs
  • Sunshine
  • Rain to nourish the ground and provide water
  • Internet – which offers 24/7 ability to find personal growth content
  • A Job
  • A Friend
  • A Family Member
  • Food in your belly
  • Funny videos which can make you laugh

Engage with Nature

Getting outside is one of my FAVORITE ways to get out of my head, my problems, my woes, and shift my focus.  When I lived in NJ, I would go hiking.  We had countless hiking areas within an hour of where I lived.  Somehow, being alone in the woods and talking to God was incredibly refreshing and wonderfully enjoyable.  Now, living in South Florida, I often go for a walk around the block and enjoy the palm trees, blue sky and sunshine.  Regardless of where you live, engage with nature.  If you can get outside and just take a look around, purposefully notice things around you – sounds, colors, textures, take a few deep breaths and allow your stress hormones to settle.  Does this feel awkward?  Start with 3 minutes. Set a timer and simply sit outside (or at a window if you can’t get outside although I am a huge fan of getting outdoors and in the sunlight and fresh air), calm your mind, breathe deeply and exhale.

Help Someone Else

There is nothing more powerful in breaking a “funk” then reaching beyond yourself and into someone else’s life.  Helping someone else can be just about anything.  Maybe you help an elderly neighbor by bringing in the trash can, or simply smile at the cashier at the grocery store.  You can make a phone call to a friend you haven’t spoken with in a while or send a text message to a neighbor.  Honestly, the list is endless.  Again, this does not have to be a big monstrous task, just something that requires you to consider someone else.  If you want a bigger challenge, write a card to someone and let them know you are thinking about them – everyone loves getting that kind of mail!  LOL.

Now in full transparency, this post was initiated on one of my “funk” days.  You are not the only one who deals with crappy days where life feels dreary, desire for anything and everything is waning, and you simply don’t want to do anything….. BUT you are not stuck there.  You can choose to write a different story today.  I encourage you to try these few steps – start with simple items and small successes and celebrate along the way.  I will be here to give you a big Hi-5 and celebrate alongside you!

2 thoughts on “Emotional Resilience: 5 Practical Strategies for Tough Days”

Comments are closed.